KEEPING UP WITH MRS JONES

New Collection

2011-09-27T01:55:00.000-07:00

Hello all,
Hope you guys are all well, As for me im just so glad fashist week is over and I can get back to being creative. So here's the thing that pisses me off about fashion and the way it works, It takes soooo flaming long. Its no ones fault, its just the way it is.
This is my first ever commercial collection which I designed donkeys years ago or so it seems and it only just ready now, although not really as it has to go to Paris and get orders then it will be around in the summer I guess, Its so tedious all the waiting about and factory visits and the disappointments as it never end up looking quiet the same as it did in the first place.
I shouldn't really moan as I have not had to deal with that side, A lovely company called "Inspired by" have been dealt with all that side of things thankfully as I dont think I would have the patience.
Im more see it, buy it, have it.
Here's a sneak preview. Its inspired by all the artists I worked with last year, well mainly Kirsty Almeida and a dash of Claire Mcguire. That's the best thing about my job is I get to meet so many amazing people and their briefs are all so different it pushes you into doing something you would never have thought to do, hence tons of inspiration.
The new commercial (yuck dirty word sorry) collection turned up fresh from the factory yesterday and I whipped it out the box got it home, got my gorgeous house mate LeeLou in it, rammed some horns in her lovely head and bundled us into the shed as it was pissing down, whipped me camera out, boxed it back up, sent it back it now on its way to Paris. DONE. Getting so inpatient in my old age. Like a child, I want it NOW.
Just need your help now to help me decide which pics you think I should go with only need 3.

Much love and stuff

Mrs Jones

xxx

Shooting Stars

2011-08-18T05:44:00.000-07:00

Hello All, Hope you all well and safe after resent escapades. I must admit I was terrified our little shop was going to get it but luckily my stuff is too weird to bother with. Moving on sharply as it doesn't deserve any more discussion.
So just before it all kicked off I was shooting stars, Well they are stars in my eyes, been keeping the new camera busy with another side line. Press shots for Musicians and Djs, here are a few to have a little gander at, remember im new at this game. Was slightly shitting myself as the first lot of shoots could just have been a fluke. Still I find its good to do things that are a little scary. Keeps you on your toes. Hope you enjoy!

This is Rodney Hilton Smith from Roots Manuva (in case you didn't recognise him) Its just a test as we have been playing around with his look, trying new shapes/ silhouettes etc. This one is my fav, reminds me a little an early 80s Run DMC which is one of my fav times in music and fashion. I love the fact there is a figure in the reflection of the amazing Cazels, Worth at least 500 squid !!! lent to us as a special treat by the lovely Lee who sells the best vintage Glasses ever. Available in the Emporium and also in his new shop on Redchurch street eastside.

Im loving this look on Rodney, What a dude!!!

Great silhouette dont you think? very dapper, well it would be as the cape was another lend from the man himself Mark Powell. Cant go wrong really when Marks Designs are on board.

Have you heard Rodney's new track? Its pretty bloody good, Im well impressed, defiantly worth checking out. What a nice guy he is and funny too. Would love to work with this guy again he's got it going on.

This handsome devil is Jon Jak a dj who is based in Thailand, plays dance, electro and house currently entertaining the troops in Ibeefa.
In this pic Jon Jak wears jacket by" I dream of Wires" which we stock at the shop. I love their wares they are totally out there and beyond there time. Know that feeling...

Yes the amazing Cazels had to come out again, well I only had them for one day and had to get the most out of them. love this pic, very sexy dont you think? togs and hat from Emporium.

Another look for Jon Jak, Adorning a Mark Powell special.

Shoot in Used Not Abused, perfect for a dj isn't it.

Sorry Neil moved one record, cant remember if I put it back

where it lived. (This is why I am not allowed to touch)

Had to have the "Classic cuts" in there !

Another wicked guy who trusted me with my camera, Ahh bless.

Be back soon !!!

lots of love and fun

Mrs J

xxx

Mrs Jones gets a camera

2011-07-13T03:25:00.000-07:00

Hello lovely people, Just to let you know the latest, The shop is going swimmingly, I am loving it , its a shame we cant stay there for always but life just isn't like that gota keep keeping on, Main thing is we are there for now so come visit soon.
Latest news , I finally invested in a camera ! it was well over due, it does I have to admit drive me made keep pestering photographer mates asking if they will shoot my gear, then there's reeling all the models in finding locations, plus its always a favour, so it always takes longer, you know the score im sure.

Ok now I have no excuse, I am currently in the middle of setting up my online shop which I had almost given up on (waiting for someone to do it for me) I am going in blind, I have no idea what im doing but I sure if I press enough buttons It will all be ok. I shall post a link when its done.
For now I shall just give you a sneak preview of some of my new camera shots.

Dont expect anything to flash its just product shoots and me getting a little carried away with myself for a change..

Spk soon hope you are all well and good I apologise as I always do for my lack of contact, To many pies going on, Sure one has to come out a beauty !

Now I want to be a Photographer when I grow up!

A massive Thank you to all our gorgeous mates who modelled,

John Pritchard

LeeLou

Kelly Love

Dan Williams

Zoe Ballouci

and not forgetting Betty Apple Jackson Jones !

Assisted by Suzie Mc Cormack.

Your are all stars in the making I can feel it in my bones.

Much love and stuff

Mrs Jones and co.

xxx

The All Stop Festival Shop.

2011-06-19T17:12:00.000-07:00

Its been about a month now since we moved to the shop, its been a ton of hard work but its all been worth it. Its starting to take shape now and we have all just about have recovered from the opening bash which was so busy I didn't even get the chance to get my camera out, Sorry! by the time I did I was back on the decks! Hopefully soon I will gather some party evidence up from my girls and show you.
For now he are some pics of the new place and some of our gorgeous customers. Its festival time so what better place could you find for your festival wares. Please come and visit us soon, every days a festival at

"The Mrs Jones Emporium" 49 Hackney rd, Eastside.

New window display every 5 minutes.

So Embracing the window space.

This is Snoopy, Betty's new friend.

He got a little make over too, and left us a nice present on the fur rug !

100s of amazing vintage shades and glasses to try on.

by Loveiwear.

check more out here

What a great little spot we have right at the top of Columbia rd market.

This is lovely Lucy and her little baby girl Zizi.

Still cant pronounce her name but she so cute.

Check out her vintage Kimono she picked up at The Emporium on Saturday.

No ones gets out of dressing up round here.

What to do with all your broken Jewellery.

we have the answer.

Neckpiece by Jan Knibs

Shoulder and necklace by Mrs Jones

Crown by Tatty devine.

Just done an African window to confuse the locals,

Just love these colours together.

A home from home.

Our favourite spot, laying in the window.

We have lots of exiting new pieces from new designers on the block.

These amazing leggings are by Elnez Niknani.

This is Sammy Scott a dear friend who also came to visit at the weekend.

She has a blonde wig on because she is looking for looks for an up and coming new singer

whose blonde, hence the mad wig.

Anyway Sammy would look great as a blonde or a brunette.

Lets be honest she would look good in a hessian sack!

Vintage bolero jacket available at the Emporium

Pants/shorts by EA Burns

To see more of Miss Burns beauties

Click here

Abstract playsuit by Mrs Jones.

Glasses by Loveiwear.

T shirt by Parillo london.

I just love these vests, perfect for festivals.

The girl's favourite.

This is LeeLou she came in at the weekend and got the full monty.

Hair by Vicky in The Drama Parlour.

Makeover by moi Mrs Jones

and the icing on the cake some gorgeous vintage shades by Loveiwear

a perfect trio dont you think.

Leelou wears headpiece by feathersmith.

Festival Kimono by Mrs Jones.

The wonderful thing is they are all one off's no one will ever be wearing the same as you.

LeeLou is a one off too !

check out her music here

As per usual getting carried away.

Remember I told you at the back of the shop is where the vinyl is at.

Well this is just one of the vinyl walls there are corridors of them

perfect for a photo op.

So know you now what to do with all your old vinyl

Bring down to Mr Macey (Bosley)

check out Used not Abused here

Another lovely young lady shopper.

And another.

I use to wear this to DJ in this black leather number

It has pockets at the back so you can wiggle your fin if you like what you see.

Im such a mum the way I think of everything.

Check out the knees !!!

Leggings by Elnez Niknani.

I just love this young ladies work.

check out her wares here

Betty is happy too in the new Emporium.

Here she is in her favourite spot checking out the trendy hot dogs passing by.

She has shot out and up the road a few times already, BETTTTTYYYY.

Yes the locals think we are crazy already, nothing new there.

Im just waiting for someone to come in and ask

"How much is that doggy in the window"

Love to you all and come visit soon

Mrs Jones & co.

xxx

Last Frocks From Farringdon.

2011-06-19T16:13:00.000-07:00

Hello you all, Been a long time I know, but all I can say is "I have been busy" famous last words.
Anyway I have lots of new pics to show you but before I do I just wanted to show you the last frocks and bits made at our last Emporium.
They are quite special so I cant overlook them. The dress below was commissioned by an artist called Alice Angus who is based in Farrindon, She asked if I would be interested in making a dress out of her art.
Off course I said yes as her work is so beautiful. It was for an exhibition on "Fifties fashion and emerging feminism" So here is what I came up with....

Bit to much emerging feminism in this one, good thing its on a dummy.

Wish I had taken some more close ups as the fabric is so detailed.

Drape can be worn up or down.

I would love to see this on a real person. It all happened so fast.

Next minite it was out the door.

Crazy how you can put so much work, love and attention into something

never to be seen again.

This dress is currently being exhibited at The Collyer Bristow Gallery

To see more of Alice Angus artworks go to http://proboscis.org.uk

This gorgeous green cape was the very last piece to be made at the old place.

The last few beads where stitched on as bags where flying out the door.

The next day it was in the window of the new place and today it was sold.

soon it shall be on its way to Burning Man.

Some pieces are born to have adventures.

New blog soon come!

Much love

Mrs J

xxx

6 Van loads later and another party not to be missed !

2011-06-03T05:10:00.000-07:00

Ok I thought I was done in from the move the week before last, Now its gone to a whole new level where I feel I have been beaten up, I am covered in bruises, blisters and am slowly turning into Arnold Swalznigger from humping to much stuff about. It took 6 van loads and 2 car trips can you believe !

Its been crazy to say the least but luckily there have been so many wonderful people on board who have got stuck in and helped us out, even Christina from fashions most wanted has been getting involved in the humping !

Vicky Drama and Kelly Love have been incredible and now we have a Bosley ! Yes its been a bit like Charlie's Angels at the new shop, there are us 3 girlies and a lovely man called Neil Macey who has had to put up with us lot invading his space, Plus dogs and kids flying about.

Well its his shop and we are renting the front part it from him, he buys and sells vinyl, the back part of the shop has the most records i have ever seen , its mind blowing, we are being spoilt with amazing tunes all day long, I think its the best shop ever, I love our new shop, Its so exiting !!!

Drama calling for back up !

Saying goodbye to the old Emporium

Drama and Love the final sweep !

Doesn't it look weird empty.

We did a chain gang down the stairs, all our lovely girlies came to help and some gorgeous Pollish men and not forgetting the the lovely lads who came to our rescue, Dan Williams and Bones (Loving you two) Plus Trisha the amazingly strong ex gladiator !

We filled the new shop to the brim!

It was all to much so we got pissed and christened our new den.

What a mess !!!

Plus its got those basted walls that you cant whack a nail in, I cant bare white plain walls they burn my eyes, Quick get men with big drills, Its ok now they are covered, phew !

George and Betty asleep in the shop window, Arhh.

The next day, Friday George and Betty came down, My head thought it may explode with hangover and just where to start, I should have taken a pic to show you how awful it was but my brain wasn't in working order.
Vicky and me just looked in dispare as we dragged boxes around and around.
Luckily George was amazing, he got stuck in and even did the window display, which looked so good I didn't even fiddle with it.
By Sunday we had it open but I was to done in to deal with it. I couldn't even talk, but we said we would open on Sunday and we did it.

The new Emporium (mark 2) taking shape...

This was last week, imagine it now, dont want to show you to many pics as I want it to be a surprise when you see it at the opening this Sunday.

George Jones window display !!!

Can you believe it a window out onto the world.

I have wanted my own shop ever since I was a kid. I would drag all my Mums stuff out her room from and make a shop and she would have to buy back her clothes and perfume etc. It has always been my dream and now 40 years later my dream has come true.

Just goes to prove never give up on your dream. Though 40 years is a bloody long time and not normal, there are faster routes im sure but they have always involved arse liking, which is something I could never bring myself to do.

This is Jude one of our first customers, he came in as we where setting up, spent an hour just looking in shock saying "Shit this is the real deal, this is proper jaw dropping gear"

he was so lovely I had to take a pic of him.

Im liking this shopkeeper role I feel just like the wizard in Mr Benn.

So this Sunday from 12 till 6 is our official opening bash, Please come down and celebrate

with us, There's a offi next door (Handy) So grab a bottle and come in for the best dress up session ever.

Seriously people you cant miss this one, its gona be too much fun.

49 Hackney rd, Look out for the pirate flag.

Much love and frockage

Mrs Jones and co

xxx

Latest News.

2011-05-25T03:48:00.000-07:00

I am really sad to tell you that our Emporium is no more, We stayed as long as we could, we did everything we possibly could to try and stay there except from selling our souls and bodies Came very close believe, but there is a limit.

It was the bloomin rates that came and bit us on the behinds just when we thought we had it cracked, We rented every bit of space going but it just wasn't enough to cover the rates.

To be honest I really didn't know about such things, The rent and bills where my main concern, What twisted bastard invented business rates !!!

This country does drive me mad with all it hidden taxes and rates etc. How on earth are us creative's supposed to survive or at least make a go of things. It seems so unfair when all we are trying to do is create a home for like minded artists to sell there wares. I could have maybe appealed against it but its all a bit much for my dislecsick brain to handle.

I did tell you that things had been tuff I just had not told you the extent of it, It got so bad it was keeping me awake at night with worry.

So now I am sat in my front room surrounded by boxes with dislecsick scribble all over them ,once again I am left scratching my head in shock horror, where to start...

Just a few tools of my trade.

Ive cleared a pathway from the tv to the computer so George hasn't really noticed !

Ok so now I have dropped that sad little bombshell here is some good news !

Luckily my lovely best mate Christina Lynsey said why dont you have a look at at Neals place (Neal is an old disco pal from back in the day) He has a space in Hackney road.

So off we trotted to go have a look, To our surprise it only turned out to be a shop ! yes an actual shop with windows onto the street and everything. My dream come true.

Hold up though life is never this smooth what's the catch, Its only available for 4 months, Ok ok that's better than nought, So ladies and gentlemen I am very pleased to tell you we are moving into a pop up shop.

I am so exited as well as feeling very sad, all very confusing.

So onwards and upwards, ok no more upwards thank god as I certainly wont miss the climb up to the 5th floor every day. I wont even begin to describe the first move out this Sunday just gone.

Though can you imagine trying to get industrial sewing machines down the 5 narrow staircases. I am strong but I can just about drag those bastards never mind carry them.

Twas all a bit much. Luckily Trish another ex gladiator came to my rescue with my Mum a couple of Pols and an alchoholic van driver.

Strange hearing echoes in there.

Cant believe how much stuff I dragged in there over two years.

Stupid things like leaving the stickers is most upsetting to me you just know

the next lot wont appreciate my efforts.

So this is the new plan, I am going to work from home and properly never get dressed again get depressed and end up in a mad house rocking back and forth, but at least George is happy to get his mum back home doing the nugget run. Then at weekends we go to the shop which I am sure George will love, Its always been his dream too. He said he is going to be in charge of pricing as I am rubbish at it.

Hopefully he is going to do with me what Westwoods son did for her. Well I can live in hope cant I.

The promise land !

Our new shop which will be taken on not only by me and Vicky and her Drama parlour

but a new team member is coming on bourd too

Lovely Lee the sunglasses man, Do you remember he came and sold his glasses at our last bash.

We decided out work goes so well with each other (Mainly cos you need shades to even wear my mad gear) No not really but he has got the best shades I have ever seen a ton of vintage bueties, Hmm yes please.

I cant wait to get in there, They wont know what's hit them.

The pics on the wall can stay but that furniture is getting dragged straight out the back, Sorry hon.

Maybe that chaise lounge can stay too, Its a great space isnt it ?

So listen please please come visit us in our new location before we are off again into the unknown.

I plan to have it open this Sunday, so if any one fancies a visit its 49 hackney road, you cant miss us look out for kids, dogs, smoke, feathers and a mad woman scratching her head.

As my Mum always says "At least your life isn't boring"

"No its just very hectic mother".

Watch this space for moving in party info (Any excuse)

Much hope and love people

Mrs Jones

xxx

Tribal Beauties.

2011-05-19T01:46:00.000-07:00

Hey people, again apologies for the lack of blogging but I am sure when I tell you guys the latest news in my next blog coming very soon, you will surly understand. Crazy times a foot.

For now I wanted to share these gorgeous pics with you.

A young lady called Lucie Red sent them to me a while ago and I have been busting to show you, they where for an online magazine called "As You Are" Titled KVLT . Finally its out so I can blog them.

I would whack the link in if I could but you know me with the buttons.

I have to say these blew me away when I saw them, They have a magical feel to them, everything I love, tribal fun mixed with weird,wonderful and out there, almost confusing as a few look very authentic, Could actually be some Amazonian tribe existing on some greater level,

till you look a little closer and see bras and perspex.

Anyway I take my hat of to you Lucie, You are one wicked stylist and I love what you have done with my pieces, You can come again.

Credits,

Styling Lucie Red,

assisted by Sora Leo

Amazing photography by Alex De Mora

assisted by Mella Ojeda

Great Hair and make up by Elkie Phillips

Jewellery by Mrs Jones for Tatty Devine

Crazy Clothing by Mrs Jones mixed with high street.

For full credits you will have to go see at "As You Are"
online mag, because its making me go cross eyed trying to do it.

Amazing work people.
Go check out the magazine looks really good.

Till the next time
Much Love
Mrs Jones
XXX

The Return Of The Nice Lion.

2011-05-02T04:46:00.000-07:00

Here you go, here are a few gorgeous pictures for the ladies (and lads) in my life and a big fat apologies for the lack of bloging that's hasn't gone on of late.
I have been in Majorca in a place called Santa Ponca which I was going to blog about but to be honest its way to depressing, It was a shithole and best left alone although I might change my mind and show you for a laugh, It might be funny in a few weeks....
Meantime do you remember this lovely man ? Damýan (The Nice Lion) named by me and now its stuck I cant call him anything else.
He went off with a huge bundle of mad gear from the Emporium he told me he wanted to look a little odd, a bit of "Where The Wild Things Are" meets a bit of urban, He had defiantly come to the right place and we spent hours dressing him up. He was tons of fun and had the kindest warmest personality almost like a gentle lion.
He returned all the pieces straight away like a good boy and sent me these too, They blew me away I love them, Thank you Damýan, You look amazing, Well done to you too Mr Tom Leishmam for the wonderful pics.

Just need to hear your music now hon, Cant wait in fact, Oh boy you better live up to this look or your be going over my knee. Pressure or what !!! Only pulling your leg, how could it not be amazing.

headpieces by FeatherSmith

Mad gear by Mrs Jones

Neckpiece by Mrs Jones for Tatty Devine.

Love and piece

Mrs Jones

xxx

Even more pics !!

2011-04-07T06:27:00.000-07:00

I cant remember half of this, Dont think I saw most of it, I certainly didn't see how many times the sound man Andy got changed ! Mental , Forgot I had my shades on !

Why didn't someone tell me, Thought I was going really blind, No wonder I couldn't see my records !

Anyway folks im of with Georgie boy to get some sun on us, Be back soon with a tan hopefully.

Adios lovely people !

Thanks Mac wicked pics hon,

Good thing you didn't stay any later, god knows what you would have caught on camera !!!

Apparently there was plenty of roof top action...., fights, and a student pissing on the floor...

and me blind to it all.

Glad im out of here for a while, phew!

Love

Mrs J

xxx

More Party Pix !!!

2011-04-03T13:56:00.000-07:00

Sorry but I am just going to keep posting pix cos they are just so good, Just love the mix up of people, what an amazing crowd !!! If any one has any more please fire them over, These are curtasy of one of the angels. Thanks Young Jenny, got two Jenny's now just to confuse me further.

Pic by Lee the lovely eyewear man

I have to say I am dreading going in tomorrow

Just found out the police turned up, but luckily couldn't find us,

good thing the door bell doesn't work,

They couldn't work out where it was all coming from.

Apparently we got a record number of complaints.

Oh lordi the aftermath commeth !

Free at last !!!

2011-04-03T06:16:00.000-07:00

Someone once said to me with Fee I am free, so simple yet so lovely, I think Friday our do/bash sale day proved that so. It was worth all the hard work and the struggle and believe me its been a right ol struggle.

Ive been on my own since January in the sense I dont have a business partner or any assistance. I set my lovely Lizzie free (glamorous assistant) as she was chomping on the bit to do her own thing and well if you love someone enough the kindest thing is to set them free.

I have to say I am so glad I did her stuff is amazing ! she is defiantly one to watch.

Luckily Chloe (very organised type) came on board and sorted my arse right out.

After an add on gumtree,

The Emporium has been filled with angels. Amazing young ladies who have made it all ok again.

I couldn't have done this without them.

So without further a do here are some pics of Friday, hope you enjoy !

Dan William's who came and set everything up, What a star, those of you who have been to my place know how many stairs there are, so you know what he has been through.

5 star lad this one.

The calm before the storm....

Kelly my new partner in grime x

Getting ready for take off

The wonderful Chloe on the left, queen of the clipboards, The amazing Kelly love

and Chloe's mum who saved our arses with a card machine. Top lady !

We love you Cazza !

The Slag jumper by Jaggy Nettle, There stuff went down a storm. More Please...

Zoe our beautiful in house model and introducing Sarah Jones, No she's not a relative though I think I may have to adopt her, She's been right on it this past week tapping n twittering and all that malarky.

She's a keeper.

This lady came early and stayed all day and night, We loved her she was so much fun.

This is Jan Knibbs she is one incredible lady, she makes the most stunning jewellery and customising and came all the way from Devon, Bless her.

Zoe and Micheala (Lady W) who had sold a load of her wicked shoes, Yey.

Zoe in her purchase, What a bargain, £20 !!!

By "I dream of wires"

Moi on the decks, yep thats why I had sunglasses on, Thankfully the weather was amazing too

Kelly Love in one of my one off pieces.

She always wears it well.

Dan wearing one of Jan Knibbs pieces and Zoe in yet another frock.

Zoe and that mystery man who keeps appearing on my blog, Sorry mate you are lovely anyway think you was up a ladder last time.

I love Lucy and her cute little baby whose name I cant pronounce never mind spell.

Here she is Miss Lizzie burns in one of own creations.

Miss you x

Meet Violetta The Upsetter, One of the new angels in town. Yep Andy you where right she's is wicked.

Can see why you buzz of her.

Oh Christina you do make me laugh with your wry smile.

Cant have a party without Miss Linsey.

And Margaret !!! another blogger came along I cant believe I didnt get to meet you.

Spent most of the night with my head in a record box.

You look like you had a good time anyway.

Next time come and get me x

Margaret again,

Got any pics love ???

Cant believe this gorgeous baby's T shirt, made me laugh so much.

Chloe's Mum having fun

This is Lee the sunglasses man. Did a blog on Cazel sunglasses a while back, he got in touch

and now he is on board.

Another top bloke and his glasses wearnt bad ether.

This dude only came to mend a wire on the deck thing.

He ended up staying all night, What a nice man he was, Yep you can come again.

Violleta and Sarah keeping an eye on things !

The Return Of The Mac !!!

Mac a dear old friend who I havent seen in about 10 years.

He was exactly the same as he was then, apart from the grey beard.

I love it when you havent seen someone for that amount of time and

nothings changed, He still let me dress him up and spin him about.

He has an infectios laugh like Sid James too which I have really missed.

More lovely ladies on the roof.

AAHHHH

Meet Jenny, wish I had a pic of her in the Kylie frock she had on, The Girlies went out flyering at lunch time, Appently her tit flew out on old st roundabout!

Anyway I owe this young lady big time, She has worked so hard, what a star she is.

She not allowed to leave!!!

lovely Jo the dj with her bargain !

Mad Mac !

Violetta bouncing around the shop x

Most people brought booze, this nice guy brought Monster Munch !!!

Never got live that one down love.. Still its good to be different.

Dan and Sophie.

Check out the time, not even 10 oclock and its gone bonkersvile already.

Another gorgeous girlie and the dude from "The Phenomenal hand clap band".

Daisy rocking some Ga Ga shades and Betty who I completely forgot about Opps !!

What can I say !!!

Meet Bexs my new lodger, Singer, artist, poet, Struck gold with this one check her out "LeeLou"

(Thank you Lou winwood good hook up )

I wonderd why this Jacket was at my house, didnt realise she brought it.

Another perk !

Suits you Tina, Well it all suits Miss Glam x

I do love her dearly one of my bestest mates ever.

No one has ever made me laugh so much apart from myself of course.

All the rails where whizzed out the way and the party got going proper.

Go on Miss Jones x

Bexs on the Dancefloor.

The Gorgeous Guy Williams, He even makes a plasic bag look good.

Once I was on the decks that was it all my dirty old ragga tunes came out.

Nice up the Dance !!!

Andy Kayll the man who came to mend the wires ended up in an old Scissor Sister outfit.

So suited him dont you think.

Love this pic.

Oh Guy if only you knew this lights up !!!

One of our neighbours from st john street having a great time by the looks of it.

Bexs modelling a Rihana number.

Needless to say we had a riot wish I could do it all over again. We will do soon, just gota wait for me disco wounds to heal. Got fashion flue, put my knee out from lifting up young boys and cant walk from dancing around on broken glass, yep it was that good. Just got to deal with Monday morning blues, can you imagine the state its going to be in !!! Dreading the thought of the aftermath.

Massive thank you to everyone who came and spent and got involved.

You can all come again.

Apart from the annoying twat that fiddled with my records.

Funniest moment though there where so many.

Vicky the hair mistress asking twat to leave, "Fee would like you to leave now,

cos well it is her night and your annoying her ok, bye then"

love to you all

Mrs Jones

xxx

Disco Disco !!!

2011-03-22T21:07:00.000-07:00

Hello lovely people heres a few pics of just some of the new bits we are knocking up in the Emporium.

Just thought I would show you some working progress. I am trying my best to make some wearable sellable pieces, Disco numbers Im calling them. Trying my best to keep the prices down etc etc.

The gorgeous Kelly Love swag by this eve to get a trim in The Drama Parlor, so I took advantage of her bod......

Gold and black leggings, MMMMmmm Yes please !

Excuse Mummies shoes.

Oh to be young and skinny and brown !!!

Gorgeous sexy little frocks being whizzed up !

Sexy Rock Frocks, cant go wrong dresses.

Please tell me how much you would part with for this little number ????

Its all very well knocking up lovely frocks but I do need to sell them

Would be really grateful for feed back.

Snakeskin print frock

How much would you pay ???

Ok I am not just about the skinny bird.

Heres some wicked snake skin pegs

Help on a price please???

Exiting! I do love seeing a new rail of clothes appearing.

So now you know why I haven't been Bloging for a while.

These will all be for sale on our April fools day bash.

I dont know what it is about having a do/ party/ sale day but the run up tends to be really trying.

(If you have patience please go back and read my blog from last year's do called "From east to west and back again" I just read it and it made me laugh)

So far I have blown up the studio lights, buggerd my mobile, fudged the overlocker (A sick twisted machine that some old fuck invented to keep women down)

Internet and emails gone haywire. Ex husband frothing at the bit...(I could go on but its just plain boring int it)

Anyway Im still plodding along take a lot more than that to keep an old essex bird down.

Please do come along on the 1st of April it will be worth it I promise.

I might be a crumbled reck on me last legs but there will be tons of bargains to keep you occupied.

Its all good honest !

love

Mrs J

xxx

Our Brighton Weekend

2011-03-17T15:38:00.000-07:00

It was my lovely friend Dean Marshes Birthday the other weekend. He was 50 so as you can

Imagine he had to have a proper bash. George and me flew down to Brighton as early as we could.

"Fast train to Brighton", Yes please... Peeked early Friday night of course!

Had to have a catch up with Deans lovely wife Jane and there gorgeous little girl Hope.

George and Hope cracked on straight away and within ten minuets the dogs were in dresses,

Think George peaked early as well !

George with Betty in her best dress and Splodge in a t shirt /dress and silver glitter belt !

off course they have to trot about to show off there looks.

Saturday Jane and I had head in hands from the night before. Now I have to dress George as the mad hatter again (3rd time in a week ) dress Dean as a king and get myself looking like a man....

The kids had there own party room complete with karaoke to boot

Hope and George head off to party

Me with Deans wife Jane, who is absolutely hilarious, back in the day we spent our evenings at parties

locking boys in cupboards. We played good cop bad cop. I was always the nice one and would say Ahh let them out now, "No' keep em in there" Jane would say.

Getting into character in the Kids karaoke room, entertaining the troops !

Dean birthday boy in his golden cape I made him for his birthday.

Dean and Jane you couldn't meet nicer folk.

My lovely friend Cazza a Brighton lass.

So many funny characters, it was like a carry on film.

Then just when it couldn't get any more mental

Phil Dirtbox turns up on the left there.

Forgot to mention every one came as "The British Pub" theme

Guess what this lady came as.

Plenty of fun shenanigans !

All Deans friends had booked into "The Pelirocco hotel" in Brighton , so I was in a different room every 5 minuets catching up with friends I havent seen in years.

I have to say I love The Pellirocco Hotel Its always so much fun. I would so recommend a fun weekend in Brighton staying there. The nice girl on the desk remembered me from about 5 years ago.

Properly after me and Jane wandered around balconies looking around all the themed rooms and entered the love room where we disturbed honeymooners !

The more drinks I have, the more the lighters I have to clutch !

Couldn't bare another man being there taller than me in a bowler hat !

So at around 3 o'clock I popped a frock on before my coach turned into a pumpkin.

Well may tashe was hanging off !!

Much Love

Mrs J

xxx

Sneak Preview !!!

2011-03-07T15:20:00.000-08:00

Oh Lord my heads still killing me from my lovely friend Dean Marsh's Birthday Bash in Brighton this weekend. Theme was British pubs, Yes I went as The Bankers Draught in the end (Get it ?)

I am still wrapped in blankets laid in front of the telly feeling very worse for where indeed.

Still it was all worth it., Oh it was so much fun !!!

I promise to post more pics when my brain cells have regrouped.

Meet Mr Jones

xxx

George's Big Day !!!

2011-03-03T10:10:00.000-08:00

Afternoon people, Please excuse me while I indulge myself in my son for a bit. Its been fashion/ fascist week, folk always ask what I have been up too, Well this has been my fashion week making George Jones the happiest boy. I cant believe how dedicated he has been on his Mad Hatter costume.

Please let him win just once.... Will know in a couple of hours. I told him not to expect it as the scabby kid normally wins it as I have had to judge an Easter Bonnet contest at another school, They confused me so much as I had my winners written, Then I was told I had to pick certain ones.... Politics going on even in Junior schools ! Better get used to it my son, Anyway till I post the result of all our hard work her is George's morning of madness!

Step 1 : Get up 5.30 hold alarm next to mother head to she moves.

Step 2 : Jump in your mums bed to do your gasha white base.

Step 3: Make sure you to get as much face paint on the covers as possible.

There's Betty asleep on the pillow Ahh..

Step 4, Try hat on with stitched in bits of hair extension into rim.

(hours of fun at 2 in the morning stitching in bits of hair)

Step 5: Start getting exited !!!

Oh George that is one good look.

Work it baby !!!

Step 6: time to get dressed.

Ive had those socks since I was a youngster and that T shirt was

one I used to wear as a kid. I knew I was saving them for something.

Today they got put to great use,

You see its good sometimes to be a hoarder.

Step 7: George's best mate Ella arrives for her little Alice

make over.

Do you recognise her from George's roof top shoot with kids.

She looks a lot more innocent like this.

She makes a lovely Alice dont you think.

This dress was made for Anna Matronic from the Scissors

around 8 years ago for a Wizard of Oz sketch they did for Channel 4.

Glad I kept this I cant tell you how many kids have had fun in this number.

Step 7 :

The full Monty !!!

Ok George is starting to get a little pissed off.

He had a mini breakdown in between make up and getting dressed

because I put my foot down to contact lenses !

My fought as he asked for them , I stupidly brought some home from work.

Following my orders. I didn't think he would really want to put cat eyes in !!!

He is more obsessed than me with getting it all just so.

Moody Hatter and Alice all set for world book day.

Shame we aint as hot on the homework....

Shame you cant see but we have stitched old black lace all over his suit I made.

Even got white mascara...

Please let me go now mummy...

Ive really had enough now mummy...

Click click click doing his nut in for once he is desperate to get to school !!

My mini Hatter

Cant leave him alone...

That's it ive had it Mummy!!!

Dont worry he doesn't usually do this nasty hand gesture

its only our dark hummer.

I thought it funny as I had followed him around for an hour with a camera in his face.

Now look what you done Mummy where's the cab ???

Found it !! George makes a flying dash for cab hoping not to be seen.

Hold up he has been cought in action, check out the little girl in the top window at number 51

Its Lilly , his first ever best mate.....

Can just imagine it

"Mummy George is wearing funny clothes again "

George makes it into cab, Safe at last !!!

Go on Lilly see how far you can crank your neck out.

Yes we are weird and we bloody love it !

Let you know in half an hour how it all went down.

Hope you enjoyed my fancy dress week.

Its not over yet as George and me are of to a friends birthday in Birthday

Bash in Brighton.

Seriously its been fancy dress central this week.

Theme is British pubs !

We where going to go as "The Banker and The Barrow boy"

obviously now George is going as The Mad Hatter (luckily a pub)

Ive been lent an amazing pinstripe suit from Mark Powell and bowler hat.

Even got a blonde tash...

Please help if you have any ideas as to what pub I could go as.

Think "The Bankers.... Arms/ note/ Draught/ Trani ...???

Ive lost me Barrow boy and got the best bankers look going on.

Just need a name, all ideas most welcome ?

Much love

Mrs Jones

xxx

Hope you enjoyed my Fancy Dress week

Its not over yet !!!

Oh My God George just arrived home

He's only gone and Won It !!!

HOORAY

Thank Heavens

Shit that must mean George is the scabby kid !!!

George's Dress Rehearsal.

2011-03-01T01:17:00.000-08:00

Last night we had a dress Rehearsal for George's world book day at school

this Thursday. Its been planed for a while now I have had drawn instructions

and all must be exact for this young man.........

George off to the Blitz Look.

I have been tucked up sewing in my room all weekend with George keeping me going

on ribina's and coffees.

Still it was worth it to see his him in his Mad Hatter look.

We still have a lot of work to do as he is desperate to win one day.

I keep telling him they wont let you win cos your mums a designer and they dont believe

its his work, very unfair to him in a way but I guess it pushes him.

Still you never know it is a new school...

So proud of my Mad Little Hatter.

Wait till you see the whole look !

I have said yes to him getting a cab to school for this one day,

imagine him trotting about Wemberly on the buses !!!

Will post his drawings when I get into work.

After some light poswation over the weekend his tall bessi mate Ella is going to go as Alice

Just made myself a bit more work but I do love Alice in wonderland

George has such good taste.

Keep you posted !!!

Mrs Jones

xxx

Invite For You Lovely People.

2011-02-21T04:21:00.000-08:00

40% Discount for SLAGS !!!

2011-02-15T12:14:00.000-08:00

Good evening lucky people,

Do you remember a while back I did a knitwear blog ???? Well if you do you must remember the SLAG

jumper. Which has to be the best jumper ever !!! Well the lovely folks from Jaggy Nettle kindly got in touch to thank me for blogging them. I am so glad I did as there may be a knitwear collab on its way....

Anyway for now they have been really kind and have offered you the Mrs Jones blog readers a 100% cashmere picking 40% discount just for you, You see you are lucky.

Now you too can be a SLAG, Such a wonderfully rotten word, I love it.

I am gona get Moi a slag jumper and I might treat little George to a television one so we can sit and watch tv looking like a right pair. Television Slag, there's a photo shoot right there. They have plenty of other great togs too I just pulled the ones above cos they are my favs, Womens/Mens/Denim/shoes.......

Go to Jaggy Nettle official website (No I cant do bleedin links yet) check out their wares and add this code to retrieve your lucky discount - mrsj40

Part 3 "Get Her To The Russian"

2011-02-05T18:05:00.000-08:00

Tied yet exited we set about our first day, which was all about "Get Em To The Shops"

A lovely guy called Adam drove us about at took us to districts that blew our socks off, The shops were massive filled with amazement and amusement.
Every thing was in districts and hours apart. No one warned us of this ! Thankfully our lovely guide made our day easier as he did styling too as well as being in a rock band needless to say he was very cool and new all the best places.

Every shop had a massive choice compared to what we have, in fact almost too much choice that you end up grabbing every thing.

Even the charity shops where incredible. We managed to get the most amazing fabrics and wild coloured pimp zoot suits, All on a tight budget.

That night back at the pad we worked late into the night creating wild crazy looks for the cast.

Crazy colourful places and miles and miles of motorways.

Where do you start, I walked straight into a wall with excitement !!!

Shepards Bush on Ice ....

Nice hat !!!

We had none of our tools with us so Lizzie had to be the tailors dummy.

Looks like she has had enough here.

We used bits we found around us as and mixed it with the bits we bought

from home and all our new purchases...

Worked on the floor by lamplight.

Done my eyes in a bit more!

Lizzie grabs a glass of wine and grabs a break from modelling the outfits.

I always have to take it to far...

You get so tied you get twisted.

Sometimes its not till your in that state that the magic happens.

Then you can have a laugh with it.

Me in my Pjs trying the dictators look out.

I always have to be the man

and lizzie has to be the girl, stood on a stool.

An impromptu shoot by the pool.

Lizzie wakes up a bit to try the catsuit out.

The looks start getting twisted up.

Check out Lizzie !!!

I try and persuade Lizzie that she needs to get on the bike !

Think we were over tied.

Andy our mate who is also the director getting involved in the creative session.

Love his gun mask he made.

Time for bed I think....

Next Day Fittings At The Hotel.......

Kamaliya loving her pink feathers.

Kamaliya looks stunning !!!

Loving her feather shoulder piece coming together.

Finally Kamaliya and Zahoor seem happy.

We modernised a few of her looks and all is going well we even have a little laugh as Zahoor explains that Kamilayas designer is actually blind and does it all by feel.

Its not funny really just was at the time as we said are you sure he is not just telling you that.

How could someone with only 5 percent vision create these pieces ???

Crazy but true....

There was a ton of other crazy shit like Andy getting wanked at.

We didn't have any sympathy as he winged on about feeling violated.

We were in to much pain ourselves to feel any thing.

The days all blended into one long day I had stayed up so long working I was literally hallucinating

I kept seeing people hiding behind trees laughing at us.

I wont destroy your brains with all the dark stuff as by now your realising how heavy all this shit is so heres pics of the actual shoot.

Finally "Day of Shoot"...

Philip seams happy in his look !!!

Andy looks happy too !!!

And after 3 times of taking it all of and off again Kamaliya Is ready for action.

Here's the Greak guy actor being dressed in Mark Powell.

He was really hot !!!

Kamaliya wearing the dress I did up for her

and the Greek actor learning there dance moves...

The waiters waiting...

Siamese twins getting chatted up by Bud an extra.

gorgeous dancers doing there thing.

The choreography was amazing.

Cant wait to see it.

The sets had done really well all art deco style, mixed with graphic furniture.

Another twisted idea from late night sessions.

A lamp lady...

She stayed up there for hours.

Another one of our crazy late night looks busting out !!!

and another..

Another gorgeous man, Who knew all about me and all my work..

Very faltering, Got shy flew off..

Diva moments in full swing !!!

Another favourite extra Marcella, whom I wont to be when I get old.

She was amazing !

Philip getting ready for action.

A Russian friend of theirs who did a bit part.

Here's the lovely Bud again.

He was so sweet.

She was not so sweet !

In her police mode, one of the dancers.

End of Vid nearly as the Greek guy gets arrested.

Phew, and its only 3 o'clock in the morning.

Andy Soup The Director and Chris the producer

who saved our arses.

Finally at god knows what hour we wrap.

We end our night with a little celebratory drink

with these two.

All mates again now its all over.

Check out Lizzies blog to compare with mine for a laugh.

dying to hear her side of the storey.

I decided to go with the tame version, I wonder .....

I guess the moral to this latest tail is never be a stylist if you dont want mentleness

Oh and a new word too that I invented.

"Sensimentle"

(A sensible kind of mental)

Mrs Jones

XXX

You can check out Lizzie's alternate version of events here...

Part 2, "Get Her To The Russisn"

2011-02-05T09:42:00.000-08:00

After "The Muriel incident", I photographed my way beck to bed. One last stroke of the acid trip wall paper, Where does one purchase such a thing?

Not from Che Bush so I found out earlier. Yes of course I asked if it was Shepards Bush? as I have seen such objada there... ive been in the shops that sell this gear and always wondered who would own such pieces. I Kinda love some pieces . I have to admit I would mix it in with other vintage pieces etc.

Never have I seen such a thing as a castle done up in a style like this. The only castles I have ever visited have been crumbling wrecks on school trips.

My head was spun out I tried to find a lamp next to my bed. I could maybe try and read for a bit but it was ether a massive Chandelier or 3 baby ones and a horses arsehole glaring me in the face!

It was no good reading my Keith book (One of my fav Xmas pressis) how could I read about more madness as what I was experiencing at that time was enough on its own.

I popped a sleeping pill, had no idea of time , phone had gone all Russian on me... Just knew I must get some sleep as I had a long old day ahead of me. One day to get back and alter a catsuit I had made for Kamaliya, get as many outfits packed as possible. Pack for myself too, get George sorted for a week!

Fill Lizzie in , all in one day as we were off to LA the following morning.

It was all happening so fast .

I tried to explain to Dr Zahoor as he got his feet done, that I have only just said yes to job the day before.

All I know about the brief is that Kamaliya is playing a jewel thief the in pop vid and that Phillip is playing the part of a police dictator, whom is in love with her.

I knew there was a Masked ball scene too, Hence me being there to choose some frocks. By now I had realised I would not be getting my scissors out that evening...

Some miss communication along the way...

Dr Zahoor was a very tall mall, impeccably dressed and didn't say a lot, Almost school master ish. Made me nervous... he let kamaliya, the cab and myself deal with the dresses , jewels, shoes and fluff etc.

Dinner was a strained affair.

Dr Zahoor sat at the head of the table then Kamiliya, the cab driver and myself, behind me was a white cockertiel / parrot who once I had spoken to it had sent it mental . Think it may have been the sugar in my Indian sweat I gave it. It made ear piecing squawking noises though out dinner which didn't make Dr Zahoor happy as he was trying to watch the cricket.

After dinner i had to go to Zahoors study and look at you tubes of Kamiliya and Philip performing said song together.

I was then cross examined on the brief, Zr Zahore was no fool and soon realised I had not read the script

I never do to be honest. As it doesn't sink in so much as when the story teller them selves tells me.

Or when Lizzie reads it to me in a calm moment.

He didn't seam impressed and my feet started to curl in my duck/ Cow slippers.

The cab driver then had to read it to me as I sank even lower in my swivel chair put my hand up and explained not also am I common and he agreed earlier ( I said it for a joke) from Essex , I dont really know what's going on and im also DYSLECTIC.

Try to translate that to an Indian Russian business man and not feel a fool. In fact it brought back memories of my Dad roaring at me cos i didn't know where Germany was on the map when I was about 10.

He made me sit in the back room and study it, next to a roaring fire.

I couldn't take it in with fear, upset and shame of disappointing him.

Now all I see when I am in those situations is fire.

Plus i knew what had happened for him to treat me this way, (All the maids had the same slippers on)

it wasn't terrible just awkward and embarrassing as the translating cabdriver took a deep breath and looked as worn out as I felt and then read me a 5 page story.

I did my best to take it in but my eyes keep floating off around the room staring at weird dolls russian dolls mixed in with the arabic styling.

I couldnt help but think fuck this is so Beniton.

All these countrys collaberating.

and my mind drifted off to why on earth isnt this pop vid being shoot here, At least Zahoor agreed with me on that.

I was so tied but again it was a cultral thing it just showed me how hard Eastern and Assian people worked. They where puting me to shame again!!!

Still my part had not come into fruition yet and I was going to show them what we was made of.

Stroke the furry walls....

Amazing wallpaper that distracted my brain.

Big Light little light .

No wonder it was hard to sleep !!!

To exiting...

The horses arsehole that glared down at my head on the pillow.

I finally drifted off in the hot pitch blackness. I was awoken my a scared little maid who had obviosly had a tuff time waking me up as she nervously taped me on the head.

I went into the main castle to grab a coffee, it was around 6 30 and my fight was at 8 30 or something.

Anyway yorning but in my own footwear I was meet by a sight that shocked me even future.

They, Well Kamaliya the nail lady and all the servants and dogs had not been to bed.

She had been getting her nails painted all night !!!

She had asked my advise earlier on what i liked for the shoot. I was shown nails like i had never scene.

Ones that had under water sceanes that came of the nail , like a porcialn ornament from the fair.

I said just do em black jewel thief maybe have a diamond on each nail.

My advise was wasted as i said you wont see it.

She they had been up all night whist Kamaliya gets her nails done in hand painted lace. It was the most delicate beautiful work. It was the girls birthday that day too and one of the 6 maids birthdays the day before. I said I bet you cant wait till they have gone to LA for a bit. She understood and smiled.

Kamaliya kissed me good-bye and said

"We are friends now yes"

I left feeling I was her friend and a women of kidread spirits.

We both suffered for our art. We had that in common plus the love of shinny things and fluff.

Back in London after realising I had left my glasses on the plane and had to get new ones asap to be able to see to sew up 52 outfits in two days when we get to LA.

Filled Lizzie in on what we had taken on. We packed keeping to weight ...

Flew home hung out with George wrote tons of notes on catdog feeds etc.

Tons of notes on George's food and school times etc. Water plants...

All for poor 19 year old Freddie our latest Lad to join Mrs Jones is left to deal with home as he now staying with me as he lives right out in the sticks.

Thankfully hes very sensible on most things plus I have no other choice at this late stage.

There wasn't time for me to go to bed by the time I finished packing bathing , noting, checking , weighing.

So pro plussed and coffeed it to airport.

My great plan was to sleep on the plane, But oh no its never that simple.

We had made it ! we where on the plane I necked a sleeping pill cos we had 11 hours and I was going to need to arm myself with a grand rest before being thrown to the lions.

We were awoken with the sound of "Is there a doctor or nurse on board.

He we go I thought , I awoke with my legs wrapped around lizzie head aiming for the window.

Apparently I put my hand up, I must have thought lets just get it done so we can crack on.

Anyway the next time I woke up we had landed in a snow dusted wind whistling dessert place,

I looked at Lizzie for an explanation. Who said unimpressed "Someone's been taken off to die"

Hours later we took off again.

This guy sitting behind us took ill next starting sweating, looking red getting stroked by his mother.

I said to Lizzie Its swine Flu we all gona get it....

Good to start on a positive note.

Sleep the rest of the way with a leopard skin sarong wrapped around my head.

Needless to say by the time we got to La it was at least 3 in the morning our time just late in the evening there's. We got through the seaches and quizings.

Steped out into a hot LA night.

Smoked 3 fags to get over it and on with it.

Into a cab and we got driven to our place that we would be sharing with the Director Andy Soup.

To fill you in a little every time I see or work or have anything to do with this guy it ends up fucking mental.

Heres just a few I have told you over the last few months.

His Dog called Monkey got Betty up the Duff.

He lost all my stuff on last shoot, new clothes camera...

He always smokes all your fags

He as clumsy as anything.

and I always end up skint.

What have I done.

One thing though however if Andy is involved it going to be crazy but its also going to be

bloody brilliant.

We arrive and land straight into crossed words and a stressed Andy whom I am now hurting his brain with my tails from a Castle and slippers...

I get put to bed.

I woke up in the night to find lizzie screaming out mens names. Work things nothing rude.

Just enough to wake me up stress me out and not get back to sleep.

I trot about in my weird African nightie from the bush an a padded mac.

Looking slightly worse for where.

I go and explore to we are staying in a nice little pad on a ground floor next to a pool.

Nice I thought to myself sewing and sunbathing.

Its a kinda little village or complex.

I decide to take an early dip after all its a fresh day and we are in LA !!!

Part 3 later on after ive done the chicken nuggets for the kids

Love and piece

Mrs Jones

xxx

The worst craziest bit still to come , gathering strength for it, hope your hanging in there with me,

here's a sneak preview of what's to come to keep you going !!!

Get Her To The Russian !!!

2011-02-02T18:09:00.000-08:00

Armed with 20 Consulate a bag of marshmallows and a tumbler of wine I now feel ready to talk about my latest experience. Oh and I have had plenty of experience's as you can imagine and know.
I can only start at the beginning and you are gona have to keep up with me cos this is a Deep breath one !!!

Ok remember my last video Hanna from Estonia, a song that sounded like sellotape sellotape, it wasn't that but George was with me and said "Mummy why is she singing about sellotape"and then it just stuck, Oh and I made Betty safety Knickers, Remember ???

So that's got fuck all to do with this its just odd as im getting jobs in Estonia and Russia, just to confuse me and now you even further.

Or maybe that's just how things are naturally progressing, As Warhol said every one gets there 15 minuets so to speak and yes im being frank, but I believe its a good thing.

Basically The Boltics are coming and coming armed with shit like we have never seen.

To take it back a little further and try and explain how strange it all is, When I left college I was chosen with a couple of other students, from St. Martins etc to show our collections in Russia.

We went on a coach from Soho through Warsaw, Poland all the way to Latvia, On the coach remember... On board was Mark Powell amazing bespoke tailor , old school smoothie, Mr cool type , who you just wouldn't wana mess with (still a great friend to this day). Osward Bowtang Attitude dude, To cool for school.... Alternative Miss World, Andrew he was lovely, with all his crazy costumes, Christos, who Christina did an amazing blog on.
So many wild amazing characters and all slung on a coach at midnight together to go to Russia to do a Fashion show with the Russian designers , I didn't really understand what or why back then I was just well up for it, Get me out of Essex for a bit.

What a Riot, What a fucking Laugh it all was. Though I do remember thinking never again. One of the students from our group was arrested and put in a mental home . It was a few days later and I said at breakfast "where's that gay guy who had the Ruff on".... Then the leader of the group found out he had been found in a mental hospital.

We had had a after show party in Russia , drinks 5p a glass of whisky (This is almost 20 years ago remember)
As you can imagine the freaky Brits were plastered.
The Guy in the Ruff (proper 20th century one, Nineties style, Big soled boots ,cropped black trousers)
had wanderd off and got arrested....

He didn't talk much after that and we just left it as other crazy shit was going on, It was the time just before "The Wall" came down and some heavy shit was going on.

We had armed guards marching around our hotel, Weird holes in our sheets and our group leader getting massed in the face and getting her bumbag knicked of her with all the petrol dosh to get back home, All our passports in it !!! and us all held up in a small room for nearly 2 days. Blocked a lot of that shit out but if you dont believe me ask Mark powel.

At first I thought it was funny and I got such bad giggles I did every ones head in, I thought it funnier for longer is all...plus nervous crying giggles gut wrenching hilarious I thought it all was and it could never get more mental than this, Oh how I was wrong.

It took us so many days to get home, like 10 or something mental. Days spent at Boarders, getting marched off coached, searched, guns and hands behind our heads shit. Living of digestives biscuits...

People building make shift houses next to the borders !. Fuck they ain't never gona let us lot through and winging it all with no passports promising and stroking heads of Russian coach drivers and promising we would pay em double when we got back for helping us. Fucking mental doesn't come close.

Still I meet some of the best people ever, The Russians blew us Brits out the water on the design front.
I was a cocky basterd back then and took mine in a binbag (some things dont change) and didn't bother ironing it. Well we all got put to shame really is all I can say, apart from Mark Powell who used sexy stocking ladies with tailored jackets that stole the show.
I cant talk about mine.

We were all to wasted from just even getting there. (Cheep vodka keeping us all going) Toilets breaking after 2 days, Suits coming off , People in Warsaw stroking Ozward Botangs head (Gorgeous looking black man designer) They hadnt seen a black man before thats how crazy this shit was and we wernt even there yet. The coach turned into a den of Divas, stropping out in turn. Took 3 days in all from Soho to Latvia. If you ever fancy it. Maybe 2 these days.
The rest i leave to your imaginations....

Ok i have put you through enough for you to appreciate my relationship and experiences I have already had with the Boltic states.
So now your up to date and can understand my concern when asked.
"Fee do you wana go to LA and make a pop Vid for this guy he's like the Michael Jackson of Russia !!!!
and he's done a song with "Mrs world"
He's loves the Scissors Sisters you see.............. And breath.....

Meet Philip Kracoff

What crazy dyslectic twisted Essex bird in her right mind could refuse this job...

Fuck I know this is going to be out there as I am working with my sparing partner Mr Soup, We did the Sis Sis vids together plus a ton of other shit, He did my showreel, I love him dearly whilst wanting to punch him all at the same time.

Were so alike. Weve kinda grown up together a bit in the industry ands its got tufer and tuffer and so we both have had to adjust.

We so similar and shouldn't properly be confined to small places with each other whilst having Russian stress.

Hold up I am peaking to early.

Meet "Mrs Word" they have done a song together (Can you keep up ?)

Name "Kamaliya" Ukrainian born singer , actress, performer, musician, model !!!

So after saying go on then ill do it only if Lizzie my amazing assistant comes with.

Deal done.

Next day im on a plane to Kiev, To be really honest im so mixed up now I dont know where I am and dont really know what's going on, Been many times did a martini advert there too (that's another story), Im so not hot at Geogrphy

"There" could be anywhere Boltic.

I have no time to look at maps!

All I know is I have to go there to go to Kalimaya and Dr Zahoor's !!!

Castle to customize her wardrobe !!!!

I didnt get the Dr Zahoor bit ether, I was just going in blind

My imagination had gone riot, Imagioniny sceanes from Edward Scisser hands, Me in Mrs Worlds wardrobe with a pair of scicors I was almost hyperventaling....

I was meet at the airport by a good looking older Russian guy who was dead nice , spoke goodish English, held his board up and I saw FEE in big letters.

It was a long ride out to there castle down motorways with Xmas decor still in full glory, slung over trees in a strange manor.
We chatted for a while but he only knew football and hadnt heard of West Ham. So we shut up.

Sharp of the motorway and up strange paths and turns, Me blind folded (not really) we finally arrived
and the nice cab man saw me to the door.

What a big door it was too, biggest door ive ever been through. I felt like tomb thumb and you know how big, tall I am.

What I saw next blew my head off.
But first lots of little maids ran around whipping me coat and boots off and this is it , the moment it all went wrong for me.

I looked down and there was a pair of Donald Duck Slippers for me to wear,
Before I knew it they were on my feet, 4 sixes to small.

But I was so blown away with the amazing astounding interior it was to late.
I sat and waited as I was told to. The cab driver sat with me, starting to think this is odd, Oh well he's nice anyway and slurped my coffee glazing down at my small weird slippers on my feet.

Started feeling really weird, Twas the slippers doing it. It started dawning on me that very soon im going to be meeting Mrs World in these things !!! whom because of my dislecsia I keep calling Princess Calarmari. The cab drivers not impressed and says shall I write it down for you. No No its fine, It wasn't at all Dr zoos, OH fuck brain was spun out and the slippers where now burning.
I booted them off at one point but I got a whiff of my plane ride hoof so popped em back on again.

They finally arrived are were very welcoming.
Dr Zahoor was Mrs Worlds husband and he was the one paying us, so I found out....
Kamailya was very sweet like an exited little girl, she came home in leathers shoot upstairs Maytrix style and came down the fuck off golden staircase in a baby blue housecoat/ dress, like SHE glided, like in a film.
I should have left one of my slippers on the stairs come to think of it.

So This is the first dress I was shown.

Theres the cab driver holding it there cos its so frigging heavy .

So its like a fish guitar dress !!!

Very long leather bottem all done in scales with chains around each leather fish scale.

Imeadiate reaksion was I just couldnt work out whether I loved it or hated it.

Yet the work that had gone into it was emence. Blew me away thats for sure never seen anything like it. Made by a Ukrainiane designer.

Here are some more beuties for you to feast your eyes upon.

Yes the cab driver is still there holding dresses up !!,.

1st dog "Kali"

Forgot to tell you there where like six little fluffy dogs flying about japping as I arived , cuddled all of them. They had a caramal poodle called Guy Ritchie too...

Yes I was in pure Fee heaven, Funny, Mental Shiney and Fluffy all at the same time.

Here's some fluff now for good measure.

2nd dog

3rd dog

Kali (Ist dog)

4th dog

Guy Ritchie the Poodle!

5th dog flying about !!! I tried to explain I had a black one , then had to stop as it all starting sounding wrong.

(Looks a bit like him when he was going through divorce with Madge dont you think)

Those bloomin slippers, that are actually cows now I can see them , but yet it doesent make them any better..................

One of the dogs truffling around.

Sniffing my cow hoof !!!

Here we go, Yep im plotted up in the guest house, check it out !!!

Left a Grazia and a Closer mag for my Amazing hosts.

I couldn't sleep so I crept about the castle guest house I was popped in.

After being told there is also a Greek involved in this too.

He famous in his country too and he's playing oppersite Kamaliya.

Oh my brain was hurting , theres too I think as they couldn't understand me,

The cab drivers been there all evening explaining/ Translating that certain bra give different push up

Lordi Lordi you couldn't write it.

There was no way I was sleeping (To exited)

I was also looking for a bleeding turret or somewhere to have a fag.

After 3 fags frozen I popped in and heard water, wicked there's a pool !!!, Couldn't find light switch so wandered about in the dark taking pics to see where I was going. Then I had a little Damion Omen Moment...

Have I died an gone to Essex heaven !!!

Ok folks im gona have to wrap this one up and do it in two half's as ive not even got to La yet !!!

The adventure has only just begun.

I hope you enjoyed part one of "Get Her To The Russian"

Much love and Glitter, fluff and madness,

Mrs Jones

xxx

NEW FROCK ALERT....

2011-01-28T08:14:00.000-08:00

Hello people I have just back from Estonia and LA, Its the craziest adventure to date. In fact I have lost my voice from it all. Still that's another story and is coming next!

Firstly I wanted to show you the latest frock I made before I got involved in Russian Mafia in LA.

I bought this fabric a while ago and promised I would make myself a dress from it.

Who am i kidding, I never get the chance to do anything for my self these days.

A lady came by "The Emporium" and fell in love with said fabric, She was so lovely I gave it up for her and here's the result. I am so jealous......Maybe one day when I get a sponcer I can afford to make up more than one we can all have one. Fingers crossed folks x

The ribbing on cuffs and collar add a sporty relaxed vibe.

She is one lucky lady dont you think.

The best thing is its timeless has nothing to do with fashion.

Its one of those pieces you can pull out year after year and it will never fail you.

Sarah Thewall's New Frock !

The drape at the bottom comes back up and get worn on the wrist, makes the most beautiful shape.

Almost Grecian. In fact you can take the drape and take it through the legs and wear it on the other

wrist. I love it when a piece can be worn so many ways.

Get her to the Russian coming next.....

Stroke the Furry wall !!!

Love

Mrs J

xxx

Xmas Highlights

2011-01-13T05:51:00.000-08:00

Hello Folks,
Im back, Did you miss me? Well i missed you guys anyway. Where to start, Firstly technology got the better of me again, this time is was a missing camera lead. You know the one you stick in and can download your pics, Boring stuff.. Hence my absence. So just to fill you in.

Our little Christmas was lovely. It was the first time ever I think I/we got to do what we wanted. Normally we get dragged off or in somewhere like a pair of strays taken in for Xmas. Or separated George at his Dads etc.
So this year had to be the best to date. We did exactly as we wanted when we wanted, Just mother and child oh and Aunt Bessie too (Aunt Bessie by the way does the best frozen roast potatoes and Yorkshire puds) So it was a dodle. No stress involved in my Christmas dinner, I dont know what all the fuss is about. You just wak it all in the oven.

For years I always thought , What a bloody nightmare this Xmas dinner malarky is. Loads of stress and shouting comes from the kitchen well especially my Mum. I just hover about asking if i can help, but I normally get roared at for getting in the way. You cant win i find.

So next year i would advise anyone to fuck off all the relatives and stress and get a load of aunt Bessie's in put your feet up and relax with a big ol snowball ( a 70s drink made from advoca mixed with lemonade and Glacie cherries) Christmas in a glass if you have never had one then you are missing out.

Considered common these days. But it was a definite highlight for me and went great with a prawn ring, which i know i kinda took the piss out of a bit, but it was sooooo good, another of my Christmas highlights.
You can take the girl out of Essex but you can never take the Essex out the girl. Thank goodness.
Here are a few of my Xmas highlights pictures. Hope you enjoy....

My Snowball Christmas breakfast, MMMMMmmmmmm

So good to do what the hell you want too,

Cheers People xxx

Another highlight was the "Loose women" Xmas special.

Normally i cant stand this programme, end up shouting at the telly,

"What's wrong with you, is this all you have to moan about"

But their performance was amazing in fact it made me cry it was so bloody

good. Maybe the Snowballs had something to do with it or I am just getting old.

Ether way the they blew me away.

George's presents he got me.

Bless him, He knows his Ma Ma loves her bling.

The nicest thing about kids as they get older and grow out of that horrid

selfish stage where every thing is all MINE.

George said to me,

"I really like giving stuff more than getting it"

Cried again !

George up at the crack of dawn tearing through his pressie pile.

The other good thing about them getting older is you dont have to leave bloomin biscuits and milk out for Father Christmas. Then try and remember to get rid of it by the morning leaving and leave a few crumbs for realism. Piles of presents from him, Always pissed me off, Why should he get the credit.

When i've paid and walk the length of Oxford st arms hanging out there sockets . Then there has to be another pile from you. Takes the piss does that Father Christmas.

George happy and content in his new Ugg boots, Betty on his lap.

Pressing buttons (A boys favourite thing) on his new game called Donkey Punch.

I know its not called that really i just cant get the right name into my brain.

Donkey Kong (Sorry)

Its totally confused my brain as its got monkeys flying about twating things.

There's not one Donkey in it.

I've driven him mental asking "But where are the Donkeys?"

Its just called that all right Mummy.

But why??? Its great when you can do there heads in for a change.

Oh Lord Please let it be edible.

Yep we even had a TV Christmas dinner.

Another first, normally have that pain in my checks by now

(You know the one where it feels like you have blown up to many balloons)

from fake smile stress pain to step relatives, strangers etc.

PHEW none of that bollocks this year.

It may not look great but it wasn't half bad.

Cheers Aunty Bessie.

Ok final Xmas high light.

A day or two after the big day George had a couple of friends over

you may recognise them from George's Ga Ga birthday.

Ella on the right, Rachel on the left there.

I entered the front room to find them playing Scrabble.

well trying too as i had nicked a load of letters and drilled them into jewellery

for pressies.

Anyway I thought Ah bless there little hearts they are playing Scrabble

and that bloomin donkey, monkey game is finally turned off.

Perfect photo opportunity.

Until i looked a little closer, as you must know by now im dyslectic

but even I could read this word.

I could not believe my eyes !!! as you can imagine.

"Who has done that word ??? (Please dont let it be George going round my head)

"It was me" said Rachel (Who goes to a posh girls school plays every instrument going

you know the sort, Violin Mondays, piano Tuesday, Viola Wednesday....)

Speaks so nicely impeccable manners etc.

She said "I saw it on a film called Indigenous bastards at Daddies house"

Though i dont know what it means.

Fee can you tell me what it means because my Mummy wont tell me till i am older !

Then they all started, what does it mean ???

George who has been brought up by me ! had never even heard of it.

This was one definite highlight.

Yes of course i told them what it meant.

I explained that it was the most derogative word for lady parts and it must never be used.

A bit like in Harry Potter, You know that unspeakable word.

VoldMort.

Well what would you say ?

So that's it , Our little Xmas in a nutshell.

New year was something else, So much fun.

Christina's and her lovely neighbours throw the best party.

Even got pics of her on the Karaoke.

Again I love her to much to show you.

Ah fuck it, It was too funny.
RIP
Here WAS a pic of Ms Linsey in action on the Karaoke, but she been in and whipped it off !!!
Shes like grease lighting on the old tinternet.

(BEFORE)
So here's one of her swigging away and me trying I presume to crawl out the door.
Note how shes note remotely interested in her mate on the floor.

(AFTER)

"Dont forget to put the lid down Darling", Swigg !!

Jesus we are fucking "Ad Fab" we even have a Saffy !!!

Tina's lovely neighbours throw the Best NYE bash ever and they even had a prawn ring I was in my element.

Until George cried and had to be taken away, Cos i turned into embarrassing Mum Opps.

Anyway People I hope you all had a wonderful time this Christmas and New Year.

Much love and luck to all of you.

Cheers to 2011

Or "Up your Bum" as we say in Essex

Plenty off Fashion frolics on its way as im off to LA at the end of next week for a pop vid,
But first ive gota pop over to Estonia to check out and customise a Russian Miss worlds
wardrobe.
(Apologies if ive got that got that mixed up at all.... Estonia, Russia thing im just going on what ive been told i know it pisses you guys off)

Anyway check this out "She lives in a Castle"
She is making an appearance in this latest vid.

Best be on me best behaviour.

So Exiting !!!

Love and Peace

Mrs Jones and Son.

XXX

I Got a Drill for Christmas ...

2010-12-21T17:44:00.000-08:00

I have managed to give myself a headache and shoulder ache from drilling but its all worth it. For years I have been collecting up, hoarding more like bits that one day i shall do something with.
A mini drill was on the top of my Xmas list. Ok i bought it for myself because no one seemed to take me serious.
What do you want for Christmas Fee ? A Drill please. But what do you really want.... A drill so i can make jewellery. I knew it wasn't going to happen so I've treated myself. Its kinda dangerous being near me at the minute as everything is getting drilled.
So for the record here is my first trial... been grabbing bits from around the house. George hiding his bits quick as he can see me eying them up..

Its the start of something! i don't quite know what yet and yes they are fake nails.

I have been dying to do this for years. Now there's no stopping me,

just need a clamp as hand held drilling work is taking its toll on the ol nails and head and is stupidly dangerous. The things i do for my art.

Anyway to me its exiting so i thought i would share it with you.

love and Neurofen Plus

Mrs Jones

XXX

Grazia, The Katy Perry Edition !!!

2010-12-21T13:09:00.000-08:00

As you can imagine i am wearing massive smile today. The Grazia Katy Perry edition finally came out

today. I have been wondering since we did the shoot if my dress would be used. There where a ton of amazing red dresses to choose from and all big grand designer names too. What can you do but cross your fingers x Thankfully it had been chosen PHEW !!!, My hands where shacking as i maniacally flicked through Grazia this morning. I am feeling dead proud and im well happy !!!

So here are some of the magazine pictures and a few of my own just to give you a little insight of all the work that goes into it. Hope you enjoy and don't forget to get a copy, Story looks juicy too.....

Will have to read it when i have got over the excitement !!!

My Brief for the front cover was, Check out Dona Summer album.

Dona Summer was swinging in a moon wearing a gorgeous white dress, All good but we have a week

and its winter so not many white frocks about. I could make one but am already making red one and if i take on another, Well its just all going to be too much.

Then i discovered on line you can get white light up feather boa's !!!

Ol lordy, my imagine has gone off, Ok so if we buy a load we can stitch them together, bobs your uncle,

we could have a very special Xmas edition front cover !

When they turned up the day before ! What a bloody let down, I've seen plusher feather boa's on a hen night in Dagenham.

Plan B comes into action..... Thank the lord of shoes Terry De Havilland.

The original plan...

Now i know why they advertised it close up like this.

Stephen Jones the hat designer made Katy this stunning piece especially for the shoot.

What a Star you are Steven Jones and You too Mrs Brand.

As the Photographer clicks away the pictures pop up on the computer screen.

See how gorgeous she is ! this is before it all gets airbrushed etc.

Clever old stuff goes on, not like back in the old days, taking a quick Polaroid

to check all is ok.

Still i do miss Polaroid's, its nice to go home with a little instantaneous memory of the day.

Katy turned up around 3 o'clock we had all been there since 9 o clock

pacing up and down. Then after hours in hair and make up.

We had about 2 hours to shoot 4 looks.

Poor Katy was getting lashed into outfits as quick as possible as time was so against us.

This wasn't a favourite but time had run out and Katy had to run off to do a launch of her new perfume.

Its quite a cute little Christmas party number.

But dont try this at home, tying up your ankles with fairy lights.

Whoop Whoop.

The Mrs Jones Dress made for Ms Perry.

Massive Thank you to Grazia.

You have given me the best magical moments of this year.

Not just me but George too.

We Love You

XXX

Imagine walking into a club wearing this little number,

you can choose to be on flicker too if you like !

Check out the stand in giant green screen ball ball.

Yep that's how its done.

It was odd because before i got the call i was already making said dress.

Trying to work on my collection....

Strangely i was listening to the radio when they played Katy's new track

Firework.

HHHHmmmmm i thought to myself how good would this dress be for her.

The next day we get the call.

How mental is that.

How it started out.

Bit of mad fabric and a sketch book.

In the making.

Flames where all cut out and hand stitched onto red stretch mesh.

Then It grew and grew....

Tassels, Lights Action !

Before i did anymore to dress I had to check in with Grazia to see how they wanted it

to look. This was slightly too scary we all agreed.

Well it was Halloween at the time.

So this is the one we all agreed on.

I know its not a great photoshop job, I like to do my drawings by hand but there was no time for that.

This was my original headpiece I had planned for dress.

I didn't show Katy or Grazia.

Bit to mental for shoot....

I will make it though, Real horns by the way.

Katy doesn't wear real fur so there was no way she would wear horns.

They are really really old vintage ones by the way.

"I wouldn't kill for fashion.

Though i think fashion may be the death of me"

(there you go that's my quote when i plopped my blinged up clogs)

Barbarella our cat engrossed in Grazia !!!

Sure Katy would appreciate this as she loves cats.

Im off to try and get it of the cat so i can have a read all about Katy and Russell.

What a pair ! Glad they have found each other.

I love Russell not only cos he cracks me up and he's a bit of all right to say the least.

Because he once saved my life.

Literally !!!

I fell asleep in the shed on me roof.

Well its got a bed and a tv and i had just made it all cosy,

drawing pined some make shift curtains up.

Candle next to bed etc.

I was woken luckily by the sound of Russell's Brands BIG MOUTH blurting out the telly.

The fabric make shift curtain had fallen down onto the candle and had just started to catch on fire !!!

So Thank you Russell for your big gob that woke me up and saved my big arse.

And lastly a massive Big Up to Katy Perry herself She is Strong, Gorgeous, Funny, Professional

and Damn Sexy. He's a lucky boy.

You Go Girl.

Much love and stuff

Mrs Jones

XXX

Appea"ring" for one night only !

2010-12-20T13:03:00.000-08:00

Ok, Dash, Margaret and Christina, This is dedicated to you guys.

For Dash because she has never seen a PRAWN RING.

For Margaret for egging me on and for Christina cos she loves it !!!

Dear Dash This is a prawn ring !!!

Un Fillet Rollard.

You know what i mean....

Ok make the most of this one becouse its coming down tomorrow.

Sunday we took Betty back the petshop

(Which just happens to be next door to Iceland)

Where we found her. To get her kited out for winter.

Check her out in her Bling Kilburn red bows.

And her boots I made her out of plastic bags !!!

Check out George's art direction too !

We came home and made cookies !

Betty getting done by Monkey (Apparently)

By George Jones.

But as per usual it always ends up just plain Wrong !!!

I know i shouldn't laugh but George just keeps cracking me up of late.

There's a bad ginger bread man too thats just way to bad for even me to show.

Where's the book on how to handle your kid turning into a teenager ?

There's plenty of bumf on babies, antinatal classes etc.

Where's The bloody anti teenager classes/books when you need it ???

Ok now seriously, Please remind me to get this gone before Xmas eve.

You know "This Morning" viewers, say no more.

Big fat fashion blog on its way.

Act normal !!!

Much love,

Mrs J

XXX

Warning !! Contains Merry Strong language !

2010-12-17T11:56:00.000-08:00

Every year we have the same old Jones Xmas problem, where is George going to spend it ? Being a Mummies boy he always wants to be with me. Yet it is his Dads turn... The arguments are anything but joyous to say the least. Still as far back as i can remember Christmas has always been the same.

I was always with my Mum, It was kind of a bit said my Mum used to say cos it was just my Mum and me and my Granddad who was lovely though a tad grumpy at times.

She always would invite old ladies who where all alone and usually deaf as a post. Which is why she got on with them so well (only joking Mum) Thinking back i realise she was trying to set my Granddad up who was having none of it. SSSSHHH will you listen to the Queens Speech. GGRRRR ( I made a promise to myself back then, "I shall never watch this when I grow up" and i never have)

One year my mum had made a melon ball starter (very 70s ) This one old lady said "lovely pickled onions dear" THIER MELON BALLS my Mum roared at her.... I cried laughing for ages over that one. My Mum used to send me in to ask my Granddad if he wanted breast or leg. I loved asking him as i knew he wanted breast but just couldn't bring himself to say the BBBBBBBBreast... word . Oh the innocence of youth in the 70s

Anyway for once in my life I am sat in peace. George's Dad has got him tickets to see Lady Ga Ga this evening ! Lucky Boy ! you may be thinking, but Oh No he has gone off her now... What are they like ??
His Dad thought he had got him his dream present, You just cant win can you, Well i can cos im sat with me feet up sipping port and nibbling on stilton. I can honestly say rather him than me.

I bet you thought we would have a crazy old tree didn't you ?

Sod that i would rather spend it on shoes.

We are calling it traditional !

Middle section is missing in loft somewhere and presents still Havant arrived yet.

Blooming internet shopping....

George with his dad Mark Jones.

Off to see Ga Ga.

Ok so you all must know by now my philosophy is what ever the situation,

how ever awful you must have a sense of humour with it.

See the funny side of things.

I guess this has just back fired on me, check out George's card for his Dad !!!

Ok you think that's bad, check mine out below.

Ive created a monster !!! Way to naughty and funny for an 11 year old.

OOOPPPS.

You see you just cant win.

But you can laugh.

HO HO HO and a little bit of Bar humbug too!

CHEERS and MERRIMENT,

MRS JONES

XXX

Mrs Jones on "This Morning"

2010-12-16T16:12:00.000-08:00

Hello folks, Im back !!! sorry for no Bloging of late, been lost in my sketch pad which is not a bad place to get lost in. Lots of ideas building up that needed to drawn up, now of course i cant stop. Its so hard to start isn't it, then its hard to stop.

Well i had to the other day as the "This Morning" film crew turned up to film Moi in Emporium !

Jason Gardener one of the presenters better known for being on the panel on Come Dancing entered and fell in love with it straight away. To be honest i think its more the relieve after all the flights of stairs painted insipid yellow and 1970s dull turquoise all pealing of the walls and trails of cotton and fabric pins all up the stairs where the cleaners have given up apparently.

He was obviously relieved to reach the top and got the colour hit as he entered.

He was such a sweetie, a real character i really liked him, Luckily !! He got the full pop star treatment then dressed him up in tons of made gear. He swished around the studio and he totally got it.

They asked me for lots of storeys but they where all to rude for early morning viewers, I couldn't even say Goldfraps tails where made from dildos.
Had to rack my brain for little innocent storeys which as i started telling them all ended up rude too.

Later on they sent a lovely young lady to model some of my wears. Only got this one picture as Freddie

our latest employee managed to fudge up mine and Jason's picture !! That's it Freddie your going over my knee.

Its going out on air CHRISTMAS EVE !!! so look out for it, i may look slightly odd as i was trying to breath in and balance (mental high heals) and not swear all at the same time.
The worst thing is about being filmed is suddenly your really aware of your arms, I actually adorned a dress for once so no pockets which of course is the best place to stick them when in dought. Where do you put them ??? behind your back fells like your at school being told off, folded in front, bad body language, Or let them just swing about by your side feels just plain weird. Any pro's out there know ???

I shall try and remind you again but if i dont it means ive forgotten myself so please remind me.

CHRISTMAS EVE WATCH THIS MORNING !!!!
Exiting...

Love and Peace

Mrs Jones

XXX

Sort Yourself Out Love.

2010-12-07T08:24:00.000-08:00

Every Part of my body aches from our event on Saturday. It was Blooming exhausting to say the least.

Obviously had to peak to early with excitement but luckily Vicky from the Drama Parlour had the sense to not leave me to get creative at the studio. She scooped me up took me for a quick spin (to wear me out I think) in some dodgy club in Old St. It was right next door to where I used to live. My old flat has never been lived in again. It still has a To Let sign in the window... Its odd as I keep dreaming about it lately...

Got put to bed at 3, up again at 8 only to find some little basted had booted Vicky's car windows in. Then they found nothing so they fucked it up a bit more.

Plans change we cab it to studio to meet Lizzie and her lovely man Tom, whose car cant be turned off as it won't start again.

Lizzie was sooooooo pissed of with me as she saw the mental amount I had gathered up the night before.

We get to venue after dragging half the Emporium down 5 flights and ramming it into car and cab.

We have our normal disaster, crushing it into a lift that don't flaming work.

Deep breaths....

Kelly loves Wicked sign she knocked up.

Men looked shocked as the Mrs Jones Tribe turn up with every thing other than the kitchen sink.

Miss Jaggers section looks wicked and was already set up when we arrived.

Fell in love with the Rolling stones necklace on the black bear.

Loving the safety print number too.

In fact everyone is set up other than us of course.

These two lovely girls where showing some amazing pieces for House of Flora.

That red hair hat is so mad i love it. The rubber berets are an amazing invention.

Very sexy too!

Meanwhile I'm still banging nails into one of those walls that just wont let you.

Went through so many I even had to bash old ones straight.

Must have banged well over 100 nails in that day.

All my own fault as I decided we are best to be in the secret corridor, with the dungeon style arches.

I think it was a good idea as i couldn't imagine all my madness around the other side. We would have done their nuts in.

Being hidden does obviously have its disadvantages too.

We started of with clues and arrows on the floor.

Hours later its all started and I am still fannying around with our space.

We had one arch but soon found out we where the only ones in this huge space

So why not spread the love.

Vicky looking amused and astonished as i just wont stop.

I have to admit I fucking loved it. It was like being whizzed back to Portabello 20 years ago.

The market talk sprang back into gear and i was off !!!

Yep we even brought a kettle and a load of Mrs jones mugs.

If only there was more time and nails I could have knocked up a mug tree.

The lid with the union jack on it is our caramelized onion chutney

which kept us all going with lumps of cheese.

Its seriously soooooo good.

Heres our first arch before we had the extension done.

Lizzie getting industrious.

While I bang Lizzies stitches.

Properly thinking when will she ever stop banging?

Luckily Vixs had bought her ipod and speaker malakie.

Amazing tunes filled the air.

Finally I finished. I thought I should pop my head round the normal bit and see how its going.

"Hows it going?" I asked the nearest bod

Ok bit slow, shame its closing in twenty minutes.

"Are you serious?" I said , "I only just finished setting up"

( Moving in more like)

The other plus side we had in the secret bit was we could stay open till 8.

I asked a few of the other traders if they wanted to come around the corner with me

They kinda looked scared and said No its ok thank you.

I realized later I had a badge on me hat with a huge pair of knockers on it.

Looked demented. Well I thought its time we all dressed up and went out flyering.

They obviously thought I was a big mad lesbian asking them if they wanted to

come around the corner with me !!!

I dont think they got my ringmaster look I was going for.

Can you believe I even made us bring the bloody floor.

I have to say I could have stayed there and never moved again.

I just loved all the mad colour against the dungeon vibe walls

We kept warm by weight lighting.

We also brought a heater too.

If you gona do it you gona do it proper!

So basically we where there to give people an experience and they defiantly got one.

So did I.

I made a rummage box and more hanging rails out of fishnet tights.

Check the crutch under the fairy lights.

Also "PLEASE NOTE THE ROLLING STONES"

T-shirt that I customized up many moons ago.

You wont believe what happened later !!!

Remember where it is- OK?

The hours roll by and Kelly Loves tights begin to roll done !!

Lizzie and Vicky trying to ignore the madness.

A moment of madness.

I decide to wear all the bangles as giant necklace as there

is not another nail in sight and the hammer is long gone.

The further down the dungeon tunnel the darker it got.

Made this the mens section.

At the bottom of it was a photographer photographing all the folk we dressed up.

They all came out the other side beaming.

Yay, we made lots of people happy.

Betty came out flyering with us.

But people literately ran away from us. I guess it wasn't the regular old street uniform.

Oh how times have changed.

Still I ran after them anyway just for extra fun.

Kelly hobbled along in crippling high heals.

By the time we reached our first pit stop The Bricklayers Arms my old haunt, I turned round and Kelly had suddenly turned into that mad old woman out of Mary Poppins.

Feed the Birds...

I dumped a few flyers around the pub and shot out quick as they all looked slightly terrified too.

I just don't get it, plus ROOTS MANOVA were playing too.

And this is the hottest area in london. Think they need me back to show 'em how its done.
Get some colour going on.

Do you like my Man wall Sign?

Well it did the trick, Plenty of boys dressing up in old popstar gear.

Even men cant bet a bit of dress up.

Its the best medicine ever.

Just to see what you missed out on.

So you must all come next time.

Fuck it lets all get our bits down here and have an indoor festival in the winter.

Lizzie my Glamourous assistant had been busy knocking up the most wicked bits.

I was so bloody impressed. Still she's had good training and also learnt how not to do it.

She is one amazing young lady and she's coming to knock your socks off.

Go on Lizzie.

Nice Hat Love !!!

Lovely Helen working the Jezabel world.

One always like to attract the right crowd don't ya know !!!

This lovely man looked after Betty for ages.

Bless him.

So whilst all the madness goes on poor little Betty has to be tied to one of the rails as she keeps flying off. Each time she was retrieved by a lovely man!

Betty was on fire !!!

Here are just a few of Betties many admirers.

Kelly and Vicky getting jealous of Betties Men.

This one was her favorite. So he had to be turned into Betties Dad

for the day.

By 8 o clock it all went off, Young boys in gold trousers its all getting too much !

More lovely people wearing my gear.

The art was shit hot .

I fell in love with this piece.

So strong ! it needs to come live in my house with me.

Sexy Pop art !!! Love this one too.

It was all incredibly inspiring.

Another favorite, isn't it amazing ?

Cant beat a bit of humor within art on these dark dreary days.

Mental Miss Kitty !

Meet a man who makes amazing bullet jewelry.

Around the front.

Around the back !

This lovely young man was a dream to dress up he was so game i love it !

He did too !

Then just as things couldn't get any more mental and all the mulled cider had started kicking in.

Who do I find in my dressing up box !

Only Jade Jagger herself.

Remember earlier I said check out the Rollings Stones t shirt (that had moved around hours earlier)

BANG, thats exactly where she was !!!

How chicken oriental is that ?

Sorry for the blurred picture but it freaked me out...

I have promised myself by the end of next year im going to get a neon Mrs Jones sign.

I just love them.

They scream naughty ness

Then of course it always goes to far !

Well he wanted it so he got it and so did they .

Yer, take this boring uniform sheep.

Then the icing on the cake Miss Glam herself turns up.

She rocked out a few outfits and turned many heads.

Go on Tina !!

Check the Terry Dehavalainds on the dirty dancefloor.

Jen another member of the angel gang fell in love with Lizzie's creation.

You cant blame her.

She wore it so well.

Found a stranger on the dancefloor in one of my jackets.

Sure she was lovely and all but it might be wise to start packing up.

Before the whole club swamp us !

Gorgeous Jen being expressive in a EABURNS number.

She can hardly contain herself nor can I as Lizzie clips her in.

The man from Delmonte says "Thats it ladies"

He asked how we are going to get it all back ?

We all just looked blank at each other.

Jen shot off onto the Dancefloor.

Lizzie had had enough of the madness and went home.

So the three Charlie's Angels where left to do the dirty work.

We had some lovely helpers who manic-ally stuffed it all in bin bags.

I got tons and tied it up in huge Dick Whitington style bundles.

Drinks where flying every where, the place was filling up fast for Roots Manova.

The lovely man from Delmonte was now getting angry!

(Who was a star by the way)

Pure craziness was in flow.

I cant even explain the journey back lets just say that the cabbies were none to happy.

What awaited us next was the 5 floor climb! the final lap so we thought.

You know when you could just cry.

Back in the real Emporium.

Look at the state of my hands !

We were all to knackerd to go back as we promised.

So we had a little girly party just to properly do ourselves in.

This is another of our lovely mates Porshia.

Working a naughty tinker-bell look.

"Bring a bag up with you" we screamed down the intercom system.

As our lady friends arrived.

Then off course I have to dress them up don't I?

Porsha was easy as she looked great in everything.

Ok so now im really tired but insist that we do a Biba style shoot on the floor.

Check out the Enthusiasm !!

Thats it I give up!

Pass out on the lovely Lisa Horans lap, poor girl had only just met me no wonder she was laughing.

It was a riot, tons of hard work but can so see it working.

Well done Ladies

We sorted it right out, love.

MRS JONES DONE.

The Calm Before The Storm.

2010-12-07T02:07:00.000-08:00

This was the only peaceful moment last week. As the snow melted so did my sanity. So just had to show you our lovely rooftop terrace covered in snow and lovely little Betty enjoying it for the first time in her life. I so wanted to be snowed in. No such luck for us londoners.

We just get a delicate dusting.

The roof tops of Faringdon in the snow.

Our Pirate flag is all caught up but the sensible side says,

" Fee leave it be"

Thats it moment of peace over.

Betty is hot on my heals flying about in fresh snow.

Thank you Tiff (Crazy Girl) for Bo Bo's old coat, Yep its been tailored to fit her and she loves it.

This is the first time I have ever got a nice picture of little Black Betty.

She really is such a sweetheart I love her so much.

See, I am a big ol softy really.

Get ready for part two "The Storm yourself out love"

SORT YOURSELF OUT LOVE, This Saturday Eastside.

2010-12-03T07:27:00.000-08:00

Hey people just wanted to invite you all to come along to above event, Yes late notice i know but im a last minute lil and didn't realize i was doing it myself till a few days ago. Vicky from The drama parlor and a lovely young lady called Kelly LOVE discussed how great it would be to have a big old van and rock up to festivals and the likes and basically sort people out, Bad hair, sorted, need a quick makeover, sorted. Lost your mates and really need a bit of friendly help/advise from 3 very down to earth ladies all who have many years of all kinds of experience, madness and pearls of wisdom tucked safely under their belts. Then i go and add,"Yer we could have a like "Charlies Angels" logo on the side....

Suddenly its all happening Miss LOVE being the sort it out kinda of gal, has only gone and made it all happen !!!

So people if you are at a loose end tomorrow please come and visit us. Imagine its an indoor festival. with hairdos, makeovers, bargains galore and hopefully a tipple or two......

Well my bit will be anyway as we have a special bit..... Being a mental funny old scorpio im only happy when i tucked up,

hidden in a little place with my back against the wall. See it as an adventure trying to find me ! Lots of bargains to be had as im having a turf out of all my old bits and bobs, Stuff used once in videos etc. Plus there will be a ton of other designers there too, From New labels to well known folk such as Jade Jagger.

Anyway im planing to have lots of fun so please come and join us all.

At address above.

I had to have a little fiddle on the silhouette, make our boobs bigger, waists smaller, hair longer.

Fag Special etc ...

Well that is my job, fiddling about, sounds wrong, maybe i should add some marigolds too...

Much Love

Be great to see you

Mrs Jones

xxx